Make Your Own Kind of Music
Christmas Round Robin (December 2003)
Notes:
This was the result of the Christmas Round Robin Challenge. The only stipulation was that there should be a Christmas theme to it and it should feature Craig and Luke.
All who were interested in writing a chapter had their names put into a hat and then drawn out to get the order of completion. Each person had a maximum of two days to read what had gone before and to continue the story.
Author’s are as follows:-
Chapter 1 – Gill
Chapter 2 – Bebe
Chapter 3 - removed at author's request
Chapter 4 – Nadine
Chapter 5 – Tracy
Chapter 6 – Baxter
Chapter 7 – Steph
Chapter 8 – Onylow II
Chapter 9 – Sioux
Archive : www.craiggilmore.co.uk
Disclaimer : Characters not ours and not making a penny off them!
Chapter 1
(And Now For Something Completely Different)
Craig slammed his front door behind him, hung his mac, which was wet through, on the peg over the radiator, kicked off his shoes and uncharacteristically left them lying untidily where they fell. It had not been a good day. Apart from the usual round of burglary, petty crime and vandalism there had been a serious mugging, leaving the victim - a young mother - with a stab wound from which she was unlikely to recover and a fruitless obbo with half his officers waiting in the wrong place for a drugs deal that went off on the other side of the borough. He was not in a happy frame of mind. Added to which, as usual, most of the problems were with the relief, rather than the criminal fraternity, and he’d had to deal with a new PC, just out of probation who had transferred from Sun Hill for no very clearly stated reason. There was something about the man he couldn’t put his finger on. But he would find out about Gabriel Kent. He’d get the truth out of Gina. At least he would if he could bring himself to speak to her.
He looked around for the nearest form of alcohol he could find. It happened to be the whisky he’d left out the previous evening, which he’d taken with honey and lemon to fend off the first signs of a cold. Damn this weather! It didn’t usually get to him, as most of his life had been spent in the wettest parts of the UK, but for now it was just one more thing to get depressed about. ‘I’m dreaming of a wet Christmas, ‘wet’ as in rain,’ he added bitterly to himself. Since the assault and the bedside farce at the hospital with Luke, Craig had remained celibate. His choice. At least for the first few months. He was in no physical, or more importantly, emotional state to cope with a relationship. He had built a wall up around himself as protection from ever suffering again the kind of pain that he had been through with Luke. He had flung himself back into work at Barton Street and avoided any but his oldest friends who were happily ensconced in their own relationships. This had done nothing to change his cheerless and grumpy reputation with his new colleagues, but it had stopped him descending into the depths of an inescapable and life-threatening depression.
He switched on a table lamp in his sitting room, put his feet up on the sofa and took a swig of his whisky. He hadn’t bothered to draw the curtains. Through the window he could see icicle Christmas lights hanging prettily on the house opposite, the rain making them twinkle magically. He saw them, but their magical qualities were lost on him. He could think only of how flat and unsatisfying life was for him. Sure, he was anaesthetised from the pain for now, at least if he could stop himself from thinking about Luke. But neither were there any highs, any moments of joy, any deep and abiding pleasure. Craig tried to convince himself he was better off like that, but with a large whisky inside him, he couldn’t help turning his thoughts to the person with whom the highs, not many admittedly, were in the stratosphere and the lows, many more of them, left him crawling in the gutter. ‘Luke’, he said the name out loud, just. ‘No one else made me feel the way you did. Every word you spoke, every insignificant action, every flash of those brown eyes is engraved on my heart and mind. I can’t forget you, no matter how I try.’ Craig closed his eyes and focused his whole being on remembering that first kiss. That tentative, questioning, gentle approach, followed by a warm, wet, probing tongue. His body, barely touching, tempting him closer. And when he did, his awareness of Luke’s arousal. Craig took a deep breath. ‘No, no I’m not going to do this to myself! I am not torturing myself any more!’ He lay back on the sofa and directed his mind to ways in which the next three weeks might become manageable. Once New Year’s Day was over perhaps things would be different. There must be something . . . Seized by a sudden idea he jumped up, put on his shoes and mac and dashed out into the rain once more.
******
The object of Craig’s discarded thoughts sat dejectedly in the pub. The coloured lights on a huge Christmas tree flashed red and blue, green and yellow and with the tinsel and white lights over the bar added a seasonal touch to the busy throng of workers having a quick drink before braving the pouring rain again on their way back to their homes and families. Or at least it seemed to Luke that there was someone waiting for everyone, except for him.
‘Luke. Luke? Your pint, mate.’
‘What? Oh, cheers, Cameron.’
‘What’s up? Penny for ’em.’
‘You don’t want to know’. Luke sighed into his beer.
Cameron raised an eyebrow. ‘Try me.’
‘This time last year I was getting ready for my wedding. In three weeks time it will be my first anniversary’.
‘I’m sorry, mate, but it was your decision, wasn’t it?’
‘I know, it’s just; everything seems, oh, I don’t know . . . I don’t think I can face Christmas this year. Kerry seems to have just got on with her life from what I’ve heard.‘ ”And Craig’s apparently getting on with his life at Barton Street,” he added to himself.
‘Kerry tends to put a brave face on things. You weren’t the only one to have a tough time, you know.’
‘Think I don’t know that? It doesn’t help to think about how much I’ve hurt,’ he paused, ‘ . . . other people,’
‘You still think about the Sarge, don’t you?’ said Cameron quietly.
He was the only person Luke had confided in about Craig. He and Gina had never spoken of him since that time in the hospital. Even the counsellor he was seeing when he transferred to London Road didn’t know his identity. Luke’s eyes clouded. He hadn’t talked about Craig for several months. In the quiet moments, when he was alone, he had thought of little else. He couldn’t believe he had been so hurtful, so foolish.
‘What am I going to do, Cameron?’ Luke turned his misty eyes to Cameron, appealing.
‘What do you want to do?’
‘I want to tell him how sorry I am for how much I hurt him. I want to ask him to forgive me. I want to ask him if he still cares about me. I want to be with him’.
‘Oh, Luke, what are we going to do with you?’
‘I know it’s no good. I know he wouldn’t even see me. Why should he after all I put him through? It’s not just the anniversary of my wedding coming up, you know’. He cast a quick glance at Cameron.
Cameron wanted to be supportive, but even he found it difficult to understand why Luke went through with the wedding after what had happened on the stag night.
‘You have to put it behind you, Luke.’
‘I know. How?’
‘Listen, mate, what you need is a distraction. Have you got any time off over Christmas?’
‘Yeah, I’ve got leave. I worked through all last Christmas. And I booked New Year off months ago, when I thought I’d be celebrating my anniversary. I didn’t bother to change it when I transferred and my new Sarge said it would be OK.’
‘Come to Oz with me!’
‘What!’
‘Come to Oz with me,’ Cameron repeated. ‘I’m going home for ten days, come with me.’ He looked encouragingly at Luke.
‘Well?’
‘I couldn’t.’
‘Why not? You’d love it. The folks’ll make a fuss of you. We’ll have Christmas dinner on the beach, traditional, like . . .’
Even Luke had to smile at that.
‘Well I suppose . . . it would certainly be different from last year.’
‘Yeah, man! It’s a deal!’
‘It’s a deal. Cheers, Cameron.’
******
Within the hour Craig was back home, another whisky in his hand and a pile of brochures beside him on the sofa.
‘There’s no way I’m sitting here on my own, or more likely with a load of excessively merry drunks at the station over Christmas when they call me in because we’re under-staffed due to an outbreak of hangovers. No way!’
Craig flicked through the brochures until something caught his eye. ‘That’s the one.’ He said to himself. ‘Hot sun, cold beer, great surf and plenty of rugby. Maybe not the best rugby in the world. Not even Welsh rugby. But good enough. That’s the one. I’ll leave all those memories behind for a while, and who knows? When I get back they may just have floated away with all this rain!’
(A Little Of What You Fancy)
By the time he went to bed, a little the worse for wear due to the whiskey consumption, Craig had made a list of three possible package holidays. Always a belts and braces man, he didn’t want to be told that the one package he’d chosen was fully booked, hence the need for the two alternatives.
He’d written it all down: codes, dates and location. Craig put the paper with his police notebook; tomorrow would be operation Holiday in the Sun. ‘Sod the expense’, he thought, ‘I’ve no one to spend my money on, except me.’ Craig hadn’t had a decent holiday, since… since, well since, he and Sean went away the year they got together - going to Wales to see his parents didn’t count.
* * * *
After Parade at London Road, Cameron and Luke set off for their beat. They were walking Beat Five, which included the main street through their patch. Today they’d be hoping to put off: muggers, pickpockets, as well as shoplifters, in this lucrative run up to Christmas.
“Hey, Luke, there’s a Lunn Poly just up the road, how about we go and see if you can book a flight? Have you got your credit card on you?”
Luke felt in his pocket for his wallet. “Yeah I’ve got it with me, just as well they’ve just increased by credit limit.” He laughed, as they continued on their beat.
They sauntered along towards the shop, stopping briefly to give directions to a little old lady; she was looking for a pet shop to buy some food for her goldfish. When they reached Lunn Poly, they hesitated outside. The shop was nearly empty, so they walked in.
“Need any help, Officers?” asked a slim young lady with long fair hair, tied back with a ribbon.
A badge, fastened to the multi-coloured blouse worn by all the females working for the chain of Travel Agents, proclaimed that her name was Anna.
“Yeah, love, my mate here wants to come Sydney with me, in about a week’s time - can you check flight availability, honey?”
“I don’t know if there’ll be anything at such short notice, but please sit down and I’ll check for you.” She smiled at them, and indicated the two chairs the other side of her oval desk.
Asking for dates, she tapped the information, given by Cameron, into her computer.
“Well aren’t you the lucky one?” she said smiling at Luke. “There’re just two seats left on the same flight as your friend is taking. Must have been a cancellation.”
Cameron and Luke grinned at the assistant, and then at each other.
“Brilliant, but how much is it?” asked Luke.
“Bloody Hell,” breathed Luke on hearing the cost, “I only want to go there for two weeks, I don’t want to buy the whole Airline!”
Cameron gave him a dig in the ribs, and the travel consultant roared laughing.
“Just as well you aren’t booking a package holiday then isn’t it?”
“Come on Luke, mate, are you going to do it or not?” Cameron wasn’t one to beat around the bush.
Luke hesitated for a minute and then he said, “Yeah. Yeah, okay! Why not? I’ve had a bloody awful year, it’s about time something nice happened for a change.”
“You want to take this flight then, Officer?”
“Yes, please. Can we sort it out now?”
“Certainly. I need to take your details so that we can book it for you.” She tapped away at her computer, asking questions as she reached each relevant page. “I take it you’ll want insurance?” she continued.
“The whole McCoy - the works - in for a penny in for a pound eh, Cameron?”
“How will you pay, Officer?” was her next request.
“By Visa - that okay?”
“Certainly Sir, but we do charge a three percent surcharge for credit card purchases.”
“Three per…! Oh what the hell -- just do what you have to get me on that flight.”
“Okay love.” Anna replied, allowing her professional manner to soften slightly. She couldn’t be doing with calling people: Sir, Madam, or -- in Luke’s case -- Officer all the time.
Luke and Cameron smiled at each other again, and then Luke fished his wallet out of his inside pocket, after undoing his heavy police jacket to get at it. He located the card in amongst other store and Advantage cards, and handed it to Anna. In the space of a few minutes Luke had spent in the region of £1000 -- the lowest fares available - for two weeks of sun, sea and sights. Luke’s card was returned to him with two copies of the transaction; one for him to sign and return to Anna, the other for him, to keep.
After telling Luke to have a good holiday, she then wished them both a Merry Christmas.
“Cheers,” said Cameron, as he and Luke made a move towards the door.
“Thanks for your help,” Luke added with a smile, as they paused at the door, before getting back to their duty.
* * * *
Craig was in CAD, which made him tetchy as he’d hoped to be out and about so that he could attempt to book the holiday of a lifetime. But no, he was inside - the only saving grace being that at least in there he wouldn’t have drunks being sick all over him, or anywhere near him.
At refs, he shot out of the station, not even stopping to button his jacket, and climbed into his car. Before setting off, he checked to make sure that he had the slip of paper on which he’d written the details of the three holidays he’d chosen. He drove out of the station yard and headed in the direction of the main shopping area. He remembered seeing a Travel shop sandwiched between a couple of mobile phone stores when he was last in town.
He managed to find a parking space and fed money into the parking meter. After sticking the ticket inside his windscreen, he walked along the road until he reached the shop he wanted. He took a deep breath and walked in. Someone was spending a few grand on a Caribbean Cruise - funny how people never whisper in a travel shop. Craig raised his eyebrow and looked around.
“Yes Sir, can I help you?” A young man had appeared from nowhere - the badge on his shirt indicated that his name was Jon.
It gave Craig a shock because at first glance the boy looked very much like Luke: same height, same build, and dark eyes -- but not the milk chocolate shade of Luke’s eyes. The young man coughed, and the sound brought Craig back to planet Earth.
“Err… sorry, I was miles away,” Craig apologised.
“Not to worry Sir. How can I help you?” he asked, taking in the lovely face, eyes and strong, powerful body. ‘Very nice’ he thought to himself.
Craig was aware of the scrutiny, but decided to ignore it. He sat down at a vacant desk, with Jon sat the other side facing the computer. Craig undid hid grey fleece jacket and fished the piece of paper out of his inside pocket.
Craig cleared his throat, and looked at Jon. “Can you tell me if it’s possible to book any of these?” Craig placed the paper on the desk so that Jon could see it and pointed to each in turn.
‘Nice hands too,’ thought Jon, ‘lovely thumbs, so artistic.’ He looked at the paper. “Let me see, I’ll just check for you Sir.” Jon tapped in the first choice. “Sorry, that’s all booked up, love. Let’s try the next one, shall we?” That too was booked up.
Craig was beginning to feel apprehensive; the chances of the third and final one being available seemed very slim, he licked his lips as Jon entered the final choice into the computer.
“Let’s see,” said Jon as he pressed the return key, “Bingo! One place left -- now who’s been a lucky boy then?”
Craig’s eyebrows nearly shot off his forehead as he eyed the young man.
“Er, well, yes, I’ll take it please.”
Craig knew he’d have to pay there and then, so he extracted his credit card out of his wallet, while Jon entered all the necessary details into his computer and then printed of the relevant forms. The credit card changed hands, and with one quick swipe through the till, it was all done and dusted. Craig would be in hock for the next year, but at this moment in time he was looking forward to Christmas in the sun, and he returned the card to the safety of his pocket, ensconced once more in his wallet.
“Thanks very much,” said Craig, as he stood up to leave.
”If there’s anything else I can do for you -- you know where I am,” Jon said quietly, raising an eyebrow, and smiling sweetly at Craig, leaving him in no doubt as to what he meant.
Craig gave a flicker of a smile and hurriedly left the shop. He had to smile to himself, walking back to his car, as he thought of Jon’s obvious invitation. In fact he laughed out loud as he climbed in. It was a while since any young man had come on to him so blatantly. In fact, he smiled all the way back to Barton Street.
Even the rain, now starting, did nothing to diminish his jubilant mood.
Running back into the station, as it was now raining cats and dogs, Craig saw Gabriel Kent going out.
“Sarge,” was all he said, as Craig acknowledged him.
Craig’s eyes narrowed slightly. There was something about Kent that bothered him. “I’ll have to get onto Gina,” he muttered to himself, although he wasn’t looking forward to having to speak to her after all this time. They hadn’t spoken since the episode with Luke in the hospital… Luke. Craig shook his head to dispel the memory.
Inside the station he removed his fleece and the envelope containing his holiday instructions fell out of one of the pockets. He picked it up and glanced inside; seeing his holiday destination, in print, brought the smile back to his face and lightened his mood once again. He strode over to his inspector’s office, knocked and walked in.
“Sir, “ said Craig, being professional. “I’d like to take my two weeks’ remaining leave from the twenty second of December. If I don’t use it I’ll lose it and as you know we can’t let it run over into next year.”
“Craig, you’ll be off all over Christmas!” exclaimed Inspector Franks, leaning back in his chair aghast.
“Peter, I’m off over Christmas anyway, so I decided I needed a holiday, and I’ve combined the two.” Craig had begun to feel quite excited at the thought of the sun, sand and the lovely cold beer.
“Very well, Craig,” he sighed, “I know you’ve been though a lot over the past year. Where are you going?”
“Australia -- Sydney to be exact.” Craig was now grinning from ear to ear.
“You jammy bugger, I’m lucky if we can afford a week in Blackpool with Doreen’s aunty,” Franks laughed.
“You have got five kids, Peter! I’d say that you’ve been too busy to go very far!” Craig laughed as he left Peter’s office.
On his way back to CAD, Craig passed a group of the relief going back out in the pouring rain.
“Isn’t it a lovely day?” he said to them. He whistled, slightly out of tune and carried on with his duties.
Chapter 3 - summary.
Craig is upgraded to business
class. Cameron thinks he sees Craig when disembarking, Luke hurries off to try
and catch up with him.
Chapter 4
("Of all the Pharmacies, in all the world...")
"No joy, mate?" Cameron questioned, knowing from the utter dejection on Luke's face that he hadn't managed to run his quarry down.
Luke shook his head. "I'm not even sure that it was him. Certainly looked like him though. I lost him as he went through into Customs...."
Luke's voice trailed off as he caught the look of sympathy in Cameron's eye, trying hard to swallow the lump of disappointment in his throat, and feeling foolish and angry with himself that his eyes had begun to fill with tears.
Cameron was kind enough to pretend not to notice. "Come on, Luke, if we can find our bags quickly we might just get through Customs with no hassle and catch him up at the taxi rank or something, okay?"
"It probably wasn't even him... I mean, I've not seen him in all these months back home, what are the odds of bumping into him on the other side of the world?" Luke managed a valiant little smile, "But you're right about finding our bags pronto...come on, we've got a holiday to start!"
"Yay!" Cameron whooped. "Bring it on!" slapping Luke enthusiastically on the back and beginning to scour the carousel once more for his luggage. Luke, meanwhile, passed the back of his hand surreptitiously across his eyes, and with a sniff and a heavy sigh, set about spotting his own bags.
They found their baggage surprisingly quickly, such that Luke couldn't suppress the tiniest glimmer of hope that they just might get through Customs fast enough to track down the tall, dark-haired guy whose muscular shoulders, disappearing through the doorway, had reminded him so much of his beloved ‘Sarge’.
Cameron smiled indulgently as Luke set off towards Customs at only slightly less than a run, and quickened his own pace to follow him. Luke bundled through the doorway and skidded to a halt just in time to avoid knocking over the passenger at the back of the queue being processed.
"Fuck it!" he breathed to himself, as he saw that something of a line had already built up, and let his bags drop to the floor with a dull thud.
"Easy mate,” soothed Cam, “we might move faster than you think."
"I really hate queuing," Luke sighed, "and my head's thumping! I'll just be glad when we get to your folks' house, Cam, that's all. Sorry to be such a pain in the arse!"
"Hey, no worries mate. It's been a long flight," Cam sympathised, choosing to make out he had no idea what was really bugging Luke. "Soon be home with a cold beer in our hands!"
"Yeah, it's gonna be great!” Luke exclaimed, as much to convince himself as Cameron. Indeed, Cameron needed no convincing - he whiled away their time in the queue dreaming of Mum's cooking, beers with his dad and his kid brother Brett, plenty of surfing, babes on the beach, undressed to impress. It was going to be a great Christmas!
Luke, meanwhile, was inwardly berating himself for letting the sight of a Craig look-alike throw him so completely. He'd been so looking forward to this break, to kick-starting his life again, somewhere utterly new and so different from drab, rainy London...then one brief glimpse of someone reminiscent of the handsome, dark-eyed Welshman he'd secretly loved for so long, and he was all over the bloody place again!
As the queue edged slowly forward, Luke's thoughts drifted back...back to an anonymous London hotel room, nearly a year earlier. He remembered staggering slightly as he came out of the toilet, looking up to see Craig still there, still with his coat on, waiting to make sure he was OK.
And in the half-light, he could see the concern in Craig's eyes, Craig's kind, caring, beautiful eyes. And as ‘Sarge’ stepped forward, so that the delicious smell of him filled his nostrils, Luke saw something else in those lovely eyes that he'd seen so often before. Pain...pain and longing. And he remembered wanting to take that pain away, because he knew he was the cause of it. And as for the longing...Jesus, he knew how that felt that too!
So he'd ventured that one small kiss...their eyes had locked again...and then he was in Craig's arms, their mouths melded in a passionate kiss. He'd felt light-headed, but he knew it wasn't just the drink - it was the thrill of Craig's tongue, questing softly in his mouth, Craig's strong, loving hands, clutching desperately at his back. He recalled his own fingers tangling in Craig's hair, as the man he had fought so hard not to love pulled him close, the aching hardness in his own groin answered so eloquently by the raging, warm firmness that Craig ground urgently against him...
A nudge in his back from another impatient traveller startled Luke out of his reverie for a moment and he slid his bags a little nearer to the Customs Officer, who was being understandably but infuriatingly thorough.
'There's no way he'll still be in the airport now,' Luke thought to himself, despondently, his mind flashing inexorably back again to that wonderful night...remembering how Craig had whispered, "Are you sure you want this?" "Never been surer of anything," he'd answered. Craig had shrugged off his coat and then kissed him again, tenderly this time, his gentle hands cupping Luke's face. Looking into his eyes once more, almost disbelieving, he took hold of the hem of Luke's jumper and eased it over his head, his T-shirt coming away with it.
Luke could still feel the silken touch of Craig's finger-tips, gently tracing an electrifying progress from his throat, along his shoulders and down over the muscles defining his chest and stomach. "You are so, so beautiful!" Craig's tremulous whisper, heavy with emotion, still echoed in his head.
Luke closed his eyes and swallowed hard. He had to stop this! A crowded airport was not the place to get a hard-on from remembering how the man he adored had taken him to Heaven and back that night. Not the place to cry, either, as he had so many times, remembering how blissful it had been to fall asleep in those protective arms, listening to the comforting, rhythmic thudding in Craig's chest.
Why the fuck had he panicked? When Craig had said, "I love you.” why didn't he say he loved him back? If he hadn't blundered on with that sham of a wedding he could have been with Craig all these months, instead of alone and miserable.
"Did you pack this bag yourself, Sir?"
"Sorry?" Luke jumped.
"Wakey, wakey, mate,” Cam teased. "The gentleman wants to know if you packed your bag yourself!"
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
Out in the main concourse, Craig was browsing along the row of sunscreen preparations on the shelves of the airport Pharmacy. He had tracked down his tour rep when he got through Customs and she was all apologies, saying that the minibus meant to be transporting him and eleven of his fellow passengers to their hotel in central Sydney had broken down. A replacement was being arranged but would not be there to transfer them for about another hour. She had assured him that she would put out an announcement on the Public Address system, to call them back when the transport was ready. That would leave him free to have a coffee on the tour company and a wander around the airport shops to pass the time.
Craig hadn't packed any sunscreen - he didn't want to get to Oz and open his luggage to find that the tubes had leaked and covered his clothes in greasy cream. His mother's reminders of the importance of "Slip, slap, slop", to protect himself from the ravages of the strong sunlight had steered him in the direction of the Pharmacy to choose some high factor lotions and potions. Soon he'd be catching those waves on Bondi beach...
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
"At last!" Cameron smiled as they emerged from Customs. Luke tried to conjure up a grin, but his brow remained knitted in a frown.
"Head still bad, mate?" Cameron enquired.
"Feels like it's going to explode," Luke grimaced. "The last thing I want is to throw up the minute I get to your mum and dad's. I could do with taking some aspirin or something before we find a cab, if that's OK Cam?"
"Sure, Luke, no worries. Tell you what, I'll nip into the Duty Free down there and grab us a few tinnies for later," Cameron was bubbling, he could almost smell ‘Home’. "Why don't you go into that Pharmacy over there, buy some pain-killers and I'll meet you back here. We can grab a coffee and blag a glass of water, so you can do your drugs before we hit the road!"
"Alright, Cam, thanks. Look, I'm sorry I've been a bit of a wet blanket so far," Luke offered, sheepishly. "I promise you, once this headache's gone, this holiday's going to be fantastic! We'll both be in party mode...and I'm not going to give Craig Gilmore another thought!"
"Sure buddy," Cam said, his grin and a wink masking his scepticism at Luke's last remark. "Look out Sydney, here we come! I'll see you in five!”
Cameron headed off on his beer mission and Luke smiled at the retreating back of his one true friend. Hoisting his bag onto his shoulder, he trudged towards the Pharmacy and made to walk up the centre aisle, towards the Medicines Counter. As he did so, an elderly lady caught her bag on a display stand and brought a large plastic carousel and many pairs of sunglasses came crashing spectacularly down to the floor in front of him.
Having executed a neat tap-dance to avoid treading on any of the debris, Luke checked that the lady had hurt nothing other than her pride. She was uninjured but thoroughly embarrassed at the attention she had attracted. As Luke crouched down to start picking up some of the wreckage, he heard footsteps approaching from the next aisle and a warm, velvety voice saying, "Are you alright, love?" The slight lilt went musically on. “No spare staff about, are there? Don't worry, we'll soon get this cleared up."
Luke froze, staring at the floor. Rooted to the spot, for a moment he couldn't bring himself to look up, his heart racing.
"I'll give you a hand if you like..."
Luke stood up slowly to face the man who had begun to lift the fallen stand back into an upright position, without having really looked properly at the young man crouching down retrieving sun-specs.
"Hello Craig..." Luke scarcely whispered.
The tall, broad-shouldered figure set rigid for an instant; steadied the sunglasses stand; steadied himself...and turned to face his fellow Good Samaritan - his beautiful boy.
"Luke," Craig managed, his face ashen with shock, "I...what are you...er, I mean...it's been a long time..."
Chapter 5
(It’s a Small World…)
Luke had often thought, and had even practiced in front of the mirror, what he would say to Craig if he ever saw again, but now that he was face to face with the man he loved, his mind had gone blank and he could only manage a response of, “Yes, it has.”
“Here for Christmas?” Craig then asked in a hopeful tone.
Luke nodded. “Cam invited me.”
“Cam?”
“Cameron Tait. He started just before you left…” Luke’s voice trailed off as he remembered Craig lying in hospital, battered from the beating he had taken and heartbroken by Luke’s cowardice. “Remember?” he then prompted.
“Vaguely.” Craig did remember a young Australian starting on his last day at Sun Hill and merely assumed this was whom Luke was referring to and then he found himself wondering as to the nature of their relationship. You didn’t just invite someone half way cross the world to spend Christmas with him and his family, unless they were really close.
“I needed to get out of London this year and Cam thought coming here would do me good,” Luke then said.
Craig nodded. “I know what you mean,” he admitted. “Getting out of London, I mean.” He paused for a second before adding. “It was nice of Cam to think of asking you.”
“Yeah, he’s a good mate.”
“Just a mate?” Craig found himself asking.
Luke frowned at his question. “Yeah, he’s just a ….” He suddenly realized why Craig had asked the question. “Cam’s straight.”
“Oh, sorry, it’s just not everyday someone invites you half way round the world to spend Christmas with him and his family.”
“Well Cam’s a nice guy, easy to talk to, friendly…” Luke told him. “He took a hell of a lot of stick when I came out because we’re friends. A lot would have just walked away, but he didn’t.” He then said. “He’s a good mate, but that’s all.”
Craig was relieved to hear that, but before he could say anything, someone called out, “Luke?” and both turned to see Cameron, carrying his suitcase and two bags of duty free coming walking towards them. “Sergeant Gilmore?” He grinned, set the bags down on the floor and offered his hand to Craig. “I don’t suppose you remember me?” He said as they shook hands. “Cameron Tait.”
Now Craig remembered him. “You started on what turned out to be my last day.”
“Yeah, that was quite a day wasn’t it?” Cameron said. “Good to see you looking so well now,” he added before looking at Luke. “Did you get those painkillers?”
“Painkillers? Are you alright?” Craig was immediately concerned.
“Just a bit of a headache,” Luke assured him. “I’ll just get some now.” He hurried into the Pharmacy where it took him several minutes to locate the painkillers. There was the girl at the till serving one person and Luke was hopefull he could pay for the painkillers and be back with Craig quickly, but the blond young man being served was asking for advice on which sun block was the best and Luke could only stand there, quietly fuming. He had almost decided not to bother with the painkillers, when the young man finally decided on which sun block to buy. “About time,” Luke muttered to himself as he paid for the painkillers. He hurried back outside; a huge smile on his face that quickly disappeared when he saw Craig was no longer there. “Where’s Craig?” he asked as he looked frantically around hoping to see him.
“He had to go mate,” Cameron told him. “The minibus arrived to take him to his hotel.”
“Oh… hotel… I don’t know where he’s staying…”
Cameron waited a second, a grin on his face. “I do. He told me before he went and I gave him my parents’ address and phone number. He’s going to ring later.”
“He will?” The huge smile was back on Luke’s face.
“Yeah,” Cameron chuckled. “Now let’s go and get that coffee.”
*****************
Luke had always been so unpredictable, at least as far as Craig was concerned, so he worried all the way to the hotel about what the young man may be thinking at his abrupt departure. At least I have his number, he thought as he waited patiently at the hotel reception to check in. He briefly thought about using the telephone there, but Luke and Cameron would only have just arrived at Cameron’s parents and Craig decided to call later.
“Sir?” The young man at reception called to let Craig know it was his turn to check in.
“Sorry…” Craig looked at the nametag on his shirt. “Brian.”
“That’s alright Sir,” Brian smiled at him. “You must be tired after that long flight. This will only take a few minutes.”
Brain was as good as his word and within ten minutes, Craig was in his room. He deposited his suitcase on the double bed before doing a quick tour of his room. Did all hotel rooms around the world look the same? he wondered. Then he remembered that the last hotel room he had been in had been on Luke’s stag night. He stared at the telephone on the table by the bed and decided he would unpack first and then call Luke.
Craig was usually just as meticulously about unpacking as he was with everything else in his life, but this was one time he wasn’t and as result what normally would have taken him an hour, took five minutes. Was it a good time to ring now? he asked himself, as he sat on the bed staring at the telephone. “What the hell?” he said aloud, picking up the telephone, pressing the relevant numbers and waiting as it rang.
“Hello?”
“Mrs. Tait?”
“Yes.”
“Hello Mrs. Tait. My name is Craig Gilmore, I used to work…..”
“Oh yes, Cam said you be ringing for Luke,” Mrs. Tait replied. “I’ll just get him for you.”
“Thank you.” Craig took a deep breath and waited for seemed like an eternity, but was probably no longer than a minute.
“Craig?” Luke sounded happy and excited. “You rang!”
“I told Cameron I would.”
“I thought you’d be tired after the flight and wouldn’t ring until tomorrow.”
“I’m fine,” Craig said. “What about you? How’s your headache?”
“Not as bad now,” Luke said. “What’s your hotel like? Have you got a nice room?”
“Why don’t you come and have a look for yourself?” Craig smiled, but his invitation was met with silence and his smile turned into a worried frown. Perhaps he had misread the situation and Luke wasn’t as happy to see him, as he was him. “Luke?”
“I’d love to come, but I’ve just got here and I don’t want to upset Cam’s family ….” Luke suddenly stopped and Craig could hear voices in the background. He couldn’t quite make out what was being said, but then he heard Cameron telling Luke to go to the hotel. “OK, I’m coming over,” Luke said, the excitement evident in his voice. “I’ll be there in about … half an hour.”
“I’ll be waiting.”
The British Airways flights from London arrived in Sydney at 6.10am. It takes a visitor from Europe just under an hour to clear customs, so even the delay caused by the minibus meant that while Craig sat panicking on his bed, it was still only eleven in the morning.
What to do, what to do. Luke. Craig looked down at his watch and it told him it was midnight.
He rather liked the idea of knowing the time at home while he was here on the other side of the world, but calm and sensible Craig could not abide that sliver of inaccuracy in his life. He carefully set his watch to match the time on the digital clock by the bed then wandered over to the table, his mind whirring as he idly flicked through the lurid colour brochures there. Things To Do In Sydney, he read aloud.
Have a shower, he decided. Twenty-two hours, even in business class, is a long time to sit in reticulated stale air.
Luke. Luke is coming to see me in a hotel room. Craig sat back down on his bed, rubbing his hands together, staring at the mango coloured carpet. Luke and me, in a hotel room.
He indulged himself with a few quick but very effective recollections of the last time Luke and he were in the same hotel room.
Better have a shower.
Like all first time visitors, Craig has subscribed to many of the myths of Australia. He is prepared to be confronted with sharks when he goes to the beach, he understands that there are a myriad of large vivid venomous crawling things waiting on every sparse papery tree, he knows that the beer will not be room temperature. He expected to enjoy himself, but he didn’t expect the hideous pang of loneliness to be soothed.
So he is unprepared for the many delightful surprises that are waiting for him in this chapter.
The first surprise is the silky soft water that Australians take for granted. Craig lathered and rinsed himself three times in the steamy bathroom. He shaved his stubborn dark beard carefully in front of the large silver mirror, and rinsed his face of foam once again in the clear water. The water even smelt different, pure and sweet.
Now he walks over to the window wrapped only in a large white towel and carefully separates the sand coloured curtains. He’s on the sixteenth floor, and thought that if he was lucky he might get a passable view of a skyline, the interesting array of buildings and coloured slices that make up a cityscape.
Oh my God!
Craig can see right down to the harbour, across the botanical gardens, see the spires of a large imposing church, up towards Hyde Park, out towards the Eastern suburbs, all ablaze in the bright December Sydney sun, all resting against the vast expanse of the jagged Sydney coastline.
“Not bad!” he smiles to himself.
He picks up his watch and clips it to his wrist. Ten minutes before Luke arrives.
*****************
“Pitt Street, mate, you can’t miss it,” Cam told Luke confidently when he dropped him Cronulla station. “Get off at Town Hall, walk one block down, you’re on Pitt Street. Easy.”
Luke has a copy of the Lonely Planet guide to Sydney in his canvas messenger bag. He intended to read it on the train but found himself fascinated by the changing scenery – the comfortable suburbia of the southern beaches, then the working class sprawl of the south-west of Sydney, and gradually the tiny pockets of Victorian and Edwardian houses in amongst the now gentrified hamlets of the inner city. Everywhere there were unexpected flashes of glorious colour – the bright yellow wattle, cherry red bottle brush, a flock of circus coloured parrots, pecking idly at the grass near on the stations as the train sped past.
And amongst the colour and light Luke is consumed by the thought of Craig, waiting for him – he checks the hastily scrawled slip of paper again – at the Avillon hotel in Pitt Street.
Central station. Luke started to count down - Museum, St James, Circular Quay, Wynyard, Town Hall, and the line of the Sydney underground.
“Make sure you get a window seat on the right hand side of the train, mate,” Cameron had instructed. Luke wondered why until the train pulled into Circular Quay and Luke saw the Harbour Bridge, the Opera House and the magnificent dazzling harbour before him.
It really is the most beautiful city on earth, Luke decides. The most beautiful man on earth is waiting for me in the most beautiful city.
One more stop.
******************
Craig, showered and fresh and looking very attractive in olive cargo pants and a pale blue t-shirt, is packing a practical grey backpack with what he thinks he might need for his first day in Sydney.
He plans to whisk Ashton off to the beach.
Map, sunglasses, wallet, camera. beach towel. He stops and looks around the room, his nervousness mounting, his shyness inching back in slimy chunks. Calm down, he tells himself, then jumps with fright when the phone rings.
It’s the affable Brian.
“I’ve got a Luke Ashton down here to see you, Mr. Gilmore.”
“Send him up,” Craig says with a croaky voice.
The forty seconds it takes Luke to reach Craig’s room are amongst the longest and scariest in either man’s life.
“Found it okay?” Craig says casually when he answers the door.
“Yeah, easy,” Luke smiles. “Great view!”
He walks over to the large window and looks out over Sydney. Craig stands a few feet from him.
“It’s a pretty place, isn’t it?”
“Sure is,” Luke says, looking at him for a tiny second and then looking away quickly as his belly ties in knots.
“You tired?”
Luke shakes his head. “You want to do something?”
Craig gives him a shy grin. “I thought you might want to come for a swim.”
Cameron has made sure Luke is prepared for anything, so he too carries a beach towel and is wearing Speedos under his loose cargo pants.
“Great! Let’s go!”
****************
Tourists make a beeline for Bondi Beach the moment they hit Sydney. This is why they all end up complaining that it’s crowded, the cafes are expensive, it’s filled with raucous backpackers, and they’re the reasons Craig and Luke followed the advice of Brian at the hotel and settled themselves on the smaller, but far nicer, Tamarama Beach, just around the cliffs from Bondi.
The boys have chatted amiably as they sat on the 380 bus. So far they like the light, the warmth and the fact that the public transport is air-conditioned. They’re delighted when they see the Bike Cops, erstwhile constables of the NSW police force, on smart mountain bikes and whose practical uniform includes standard issue deep blue cycle shorts. They both look closely at the bars and shops of what is known as the Golden Mile, Sydney’s gay heartland in Darlinghurst.
A Santa in full scarlet regalia, seemingly oblivious to the heat, is ringing his bell in the shops of Bondi Junction. Luke and Craig are both surprised to remember that it is Christmas Eve.
“Do they even have fireplaces here?” Luke wonders.
Craig doesn’t know. Santa is making him sweaty. “I think they have barbeques instead.”
And the people. Sydney is a multicultural city, and one of the largest contingents of recent settlers are from South East Asia.
So there are many great restaurants, and Luke and Craig realise soon that they would need months to try the Korean, Thai, Vietnamese, Malaysian, Chinese, Taiwanese, Japanese, Italian, Greek, Croatian places they’ve seen already. And they’ve only travelled a couple of miles.
They get off at the top off Campbell Parade, as Brian instructed. The sweat on their faces evaporates immediately in the heavy salt scented ocean breeze.
Luke, hot and thirsty, spies a small mixed business just a few metres away.
“I’ll just get some water.”
Craig is thrilled by this next surprise. When they walk into the little shop, they are confronted with a fabulous display of Australian summer fruits – big fat bananas, chubby peaches, enormous crimson nectarines, huge glossy cherries – all fresh, all local, all unbelievably cheap.
They sit on the top of the cliff that separates Bondi from Tamarama, sucking the soft flesh of peaches from their stones while they trace their journey on the map in Luke’s guide book.
“Down there,” Craig points, and sure enough they find a track winding around the cliff, jutting rock steps that take them to the discreet little beach where they find a nice little private spot up near the rocks.
“Here’s okay?” Luke asks, pulling his towel from his bag.
Craig is scanning the wide expanse of the Pacific Ocean.
“Perfect,” he answers as he looks out to sea.
Now I have to take my clothes off, they both think with terror. Of course neither wants the other to know of that terror, so they both casually pull away their tee shirts, undo their pants and lay out their towels as if they do this kind of thing all the time.
Cold water. It’ll go away if I can just get in the water, they both reassure themselves as their interest in the sight of each other grows markedly.
Luke looks up to see where the flags are; Craig, a little more used to the surf of the south coast of Wales, looks for a rip. He wades out in to the ocean, surprised at how the warm the water is, noting just a slight pull across the strong waves. He has, to his relief, also seen the sign indicating that shark nets are in place around the cove.
Luke, who has swum off the coast of South Africa when he worked for MSF, is also familiar with surf, but he turns out to be not quite as powerful a swimmer as Craig. He follows him out into the water, their skin hot in the blazing sun and watches Craig dive right through a wave just before it breaks.
He comes out the other side, slick with salty water and can already feel the cobwebs and misery that have shrouded him for months have simply washed away. (Sydney surf is like that.) Luke dives into the next glassy face of water that pushes into the sand and goes right through the green water with his eyes open, bobbing up near Craig just beyond the first line of breakers.
It is so clean, so refreshing. They feel completely rejuvenated, and grin broadly at each other wet salty faces. They rise with the waves, letting the strong water push their bodies up through the force, drawing them a little further out into the clean surf, then playfully pushing them quickly back in.
**************
Craig and Luke are sitting on their towels, burrowing their toes into to warm fine sand, making good progress with their study of Australian fruit.
“What haven’t you tried?” Luke asks as he pokes around in one the bags.
“Haven’t had a nectarine yet.”
“You’re in for a treat,” he tells him earnestly as he over hands over a gold red orb.
“This could not be better,” Craig says contentedly.
“Too right!” Luke drawls in a fairly passable Australian accent.
But sooner or later, they both know, they’ll have to get the unpleasant business of their aborted relationship behind them.
When they’ve had their fill of fruit, Luke takes a brave stab with a sorrowful, guilty voice.
“We have to talk about it,” he says quietly to Craig, as they sit side by side in the warmth, staring at the beautiful water.
“I know,” Craig agrees quietly. He thinks for a moment, but has no idea where to start. He looks across at Luke, who is staring at him with miserable eyes.
“I can’t tell you how sorry I am for everything. I really am.”
Craig says nothing, just looks at their sandy toes.
“I really am, Craig. I would have...I thought you’d prefer it if I didn’t contact you. I mean, I really wanted to, but I thought … it all went really wrong, after you left.”
“I know,” he answers, sparing Luke any further grief. “Gina told me.”
Luke gathers his thoughts.
“I’m sorry,” is all he can think of to say. “I didn’t mean for it to be like that. I really…” and his voice trails off as he looks out to the perfect blue swell rolling in towards them.
“It’s done now,” Craig tells him, wishing he could gather the courage to ask him more, wishing he could find out if Luke still feels anything for him.
But he doesn’t have to, because Luke’s leaning over, one hand clutching the sand though his towel, the other steadying itself on Craig’s arm, his warm salty face dipping into Craig’s, nudging him, looking to kiss softly at first, then a little deeper, until their lips are stroking against each other.
“I was going to ask you if you were still interested,” Craig whispers against Luke’s sweet mouth.
“I was going to tell you I was still interested but didn’t know how else to say it,” Luke whispers back.
“That’s a good way,” Craig says softly. “Tell me again.”
It ends up being such an effective form of communication that in only a few minutes both men have to get back into the cold surf.
“Later,” Craig whispers to Luke as they stand side by side in the cooling ocean, later.
*****************
“I’ve got sand in my swimming trunks,” Craig grimaces at Luke.
The showers at Tamarama are actually just large taps that are set on tall poles, and they are not indoors. It’s a common fixture at an Australian beach. Have a rinse then dry off in the sun. Luke has already washed the salt and sea from his body and now is watching the cold water pouring over Craig.
“Show me!” Luke asks nicely.
Craig pulls a disapproving face, but there is delight in his eyes.
“Later,” he says again, teasing.
They’ve decided to stop in Darlinghurst on their way back to the city. They saw so many interesting restaurants there on the trip to the beach, and it seemed like a lively, friendly place. Afterwards they thought they could stroll through Hyde Park. (Craig is very keen to see a ring-tailed possum and some fruit foxes.) They haven’t made any firm plans from that point, but Luke has already formulated what he will say to Cam when he calls him in a short while.
“What do you feel like for dinner?” Craig asks as he and Luke walk back up towards the bus stop. He’s starving.
“We should do something special, since it’s our first night in Sydney. And it’s Christmas Eve.”
“Like what? We’re not really dressed for somewhere special.”
“Well, I’ve never had Korean food, or…I dunno, is there such thing as Australian food?”
They research this in the guidebook as they sit opposite one another on the bus back to the city. Craig has a somewhat disapproving look on his face as he reads of a place that serves kangaroo fillet and witchety grubs. Gourmet bush tucker.
He looks up at Luke to see how he might feel about witchety grubs, but can’t speak when he sees Luke’s face.
“What?” Luke asks, smiling, wondering.
You look beautiful, fresh and young, sun kissed and beautiful, but Craig can’t say this, not yet, and certainly not in a crowded bus.
“Your nose is pink,” Craig says quietly.
“So’s yours,” Luke answers, his face gentle.
They look into one another’s eyes, bright and shining against their tanned faces. The bus stops, and a cheerful drunk staggers on to the bus, noisy and full of Christmas cheer.
“Santa comes tonight!” the drunk says loudly to the largely uninterested passengers.
Luke and Craig look into one another’s eyes again, push their feet over so their ankles are locked together and smile broadly. So do we, they both think at the same time.
Dinner is going well, the Korean restaurant they have chosen is noisy and friendly and not a witchety grub in sight. Luke takes a mouthful of food from Craig’s proffered fork.
“Hm, interesting taste. What is it?”
“Ch’ong-gak Kimchi, apparently.” Craig carefully pronounces each syllable from the menu in front of him. “Bachelor radish Kimchi.”
He raises an eyebrow in mock disapproval as Luke snorts and nearly chokes on his food.
“Bachelor radish Kimchi? Do you think they’re trying to tell us something?”
“According to the blurb,” Craig continues seriously, “unmarried Koreans wore their hair braided and it resembled a radish top, hence the name.” He looks up and sees Luke struggling with suppressed laughter. As they continue to look at each other Craig can no longer hold his expression and they both burst out laughing. They are still giggling occasionally, an hour later, as they leave the restaurant, hunger satisfied and feeling considerably closer.
“What now?” says Craig, suddenly nervous and excited at the same time.
“I should ring Cam,” says Luke, quietly. He’s feeling guilty that he’s abandoned his friend after Cameron’s been so good to him.
Craig can’t think of anything to say so nods in what he hopes is an agreeable manner. They walk in silence to the nearest bus stop and Craig sits quietly, thinking, as Luke makes his call.
“Hi, Cam? It’s Luke. Yeah great, thanks.” Craig can see a faint pink glow on his cheeks that isn’t entirely due to the sun and wonders what Cameron is saying. He’s finding it hard to believe that he is here with Luke when just a few short hours ago he was feeling that his life had hit the bottom and looked like staying there. He’s so absorbed in his thoughts and in studying the beautiful face before him that it takes him a while to realise that Luke has finished his call and is looking at him gently.
“So, do I get to see how much sand you’ve got in your shorts, or what?” he whispers, his face almost touching Craig’s.
“What about Cameron?” Craig’s eyes never leave Luke’s as he holds his breath, waiting for the response.
A blush spreads over Luke’s already pink cheeks. “Erm… I’m meeting him tomorrow at eleven thirty.”
“So where are you staying tonight then?” Craig is enjoying himself enormously now and Luke uses his best seductive look, aware of the game.
“I thought I might try and pick up a tall, handsome Welshman and get him to take me back to his hotel room.”
“You did, did you?”
“Yeah. Do you know any?” Luke ducks a playful punch.
“I think I might know the very man.” Glancing quickly around, Craig leans into Luke and kisses him lightly on the lips.
As the bus arrives, they are smiling at each other and feeling a warm glow of anticipation.
Back in Craig’s hotel room they hover nervously for a while, uncertain of how to begin; the weight of their history still hampering them slightly.
Luke walks over to the window, taking the opportunity to gather his courage.
“Wow, this really is beautiful,” he says softly, and Craig, watching him from a distance, smiles and thinks that whatever happens he’ll forever have the memory of Luke against the backdrop of a Sydney skyline etched in his memory.
Luke turns slightly as two strong, warm arms slide around his waist and a head rests on his shoulder. He smiles and they kiss, shyly, tenderly, their vision fuzzy with desire. Luke runs a hand through Craig’s hair and strokes the side of his face letting his fingers linger for a moment on the warm skin. God how I’ve missed this, he thinks, and the pain and longing swell again in his heart.
Craig is kissing his neck gently and his hands turn Luke around until they are facing each other. Pulling back slightly, Craig looks at him, his face serious for a moment.
“Are you sure you want this?” his voice is hoarse with longing but he has to be sure, more sure than last time.
“Craig, I want this more than anything in the world. I wanted it last time, that wasn’t a lie, even if the rest of my life was.” There is pain etched in every line of Luke’s face and Craig’s heart bleeds for him. His own pain and misery is forgotten in his need to heal Luke and he holds him close, eyes closed.
When he pulls away slightly, he sees a single tear track on Luke’s cheek and bends to kiss it away whispering softly, “No more tears, we’ve had too many already.”
Luke smiles as Craig leads him to the bed and slowly begins to undress him. Soon their breathing is becoming harsh and rapid and their touch is more urgent as they tumble onto the cool white sheets. Craig strokes the smooth, warm skin of Luke’s stomach and is rewarded with a shiver of anticipation. Their touches become firmer and their kisses more passionate as they search for fulfilment. The heat from Craig’s tongue in his mouth sends Luke into a frenzy of thrashing and thrusting. Craig’s control is slipping and he finds himself responding to Luke’s eager thrusts with equal force.
As if from a single thought, they both pause and look into each other’s eyes then Luke is reaching over to the pile of discarded clothes and pulling something from a pocket. With a lopsided smile he hands it to Craig who raises an eyebrow in query.
“The airport…when I went to get the painkillers.”
Craig’s smile broadens into a grin. “Cheeky,” he whispers, and they both laugh.
Luke gasps as Craig nudges his knees apart and touches him. Craig is skilful and gentle and Luke is soon moaning with pleasure as he feels Craig’s solid body wedged between his thighs. As they begin to move a surge of possessiveness grips Luke and he holds Craig tight, jealously guarding his lover.
“I love you,” he gasps close to Craig’s ear and is rewarded with an equally possessive kiss to his throat.
Despite the air-conditioning in the room, they are soon slick with sweat and their breath is escaping in short sharp gasps. Luke is surprised out of his oblivion by strong arms flipping him over until he is straddling Craig. He groans as a tidal wave of erotic pleasure sweeps over him and he takes control of the pace, thrusting slowly and firmly, transfixed by the look of pure ecstasy on Craig’s face. The exhilaration of being thousands of miles away from home, in bed with Craig Gilmore, has him soon fucking Craig with an abandon he’s never known before. Throwing his head back, Luke comes with a cry, pouring hot, silky wetness over Craig’s already slick body. Craig’s orgasm is wrenched from deep within his soul and it’s a while before either of them can move.
As Craig wraps his arms contentedly around the sleepy body of his beautiful boy and kisses him lightly on the head, smiling.
“Do you know it’s nearly Christmas Day?” he whispers, “and I couldn’t have wished for any present more special than you.”
“Really?” Luke looks up at him, unsure but adoring.
“Mm… love you Luke, I always have. I know we’ll have a few ghosts to lay to rest but I’m willing to do that if you are.”
“Oh Craig, I love you so much. I know I can’t take it all back but I will never, ever hurt you like that again, I swear.
“I know,” says Craig simply, and he does.
Some time later Craig wakes from a blissful state of sleep to feel the bed empty beside him. It’s almost midnight and looking around, curious, he spots Luke standing by the window gazing into the clear moonlit sky over Sydney harbour. Climbing quietly out of bed he crosses the room and slips his arms around Luke’s waist.
“What are we looking at?” he whispers, nuzzling the warm flesh of Luke’s neck sleepily.
Luke half turns, kissing him softly on the cheek, now rough with stubble, and raises one hand to pull Craig’s head closer.
“It’s Christmas Eve. We’re waiting for Santa,” he says quietly, snuggling himself deeper into Craig’s embrace.
“You believe in Santa?” smiles Craig.
“Yes…at least… I believe in Christmas magic. Otherwise, how do you explain us, being here, thousands of miles away from home at the same time? It must be magic.”
Craig thinks about this for a moment and tightens his hold on Luke.
“I think you’re right, it must be magic,” he says, slowly turning Luke towards him before kissing him tenderly.
(Santa comes…and not down the chimney, either)
Itchy, Luke thinks in his sleep.
He idly scratches his left arm before drifting off again.
He’s dreaming of Craig. Craig kissing him. Craig touching him. Luke is so in love with him. He’s so, so in love with his lovely, lovely Craig.
Luke smiles as he sleeps. He never wants Craig to stop kissing and touching him like this. Forever, he thinks. That’s what I want. Craig Gilmore in my arms forever.
Funny how only a day ago he thought Craig Gilmore was doomed to merely be part of his painful past, not likely to ever become part of his present – and certainly not his future. Now they’ve found each other again, Luke thinks that what he wants may well be what he gets this time. Forever. They’re perfect together, he and Craig, so why can’t it last forever? It’s passionate. Loving. Intense. Great fun…
And itchy. He scratches his right thigh.
But then he’s off again to the wonderful world of Gilmore Love. Gentle hands on his penis now. Mmmmmm … wonderful. More please.
If only the itching would stop…
Mmmmm. Craig’s mouth is now exploring Luke’s rapidly hardening penis. Licking, suckling gently, teasing the foreskin with his tongue. Mouth now so firmly sucking the head it feels like it has been suctioned on. Amazing.
Stop itching, Luke thinks as he scratches his left thigh. But scratches very carefully, though...Even in his sleep, he is aware of not disturbing Craig while he is hard at work. Hehehehehe. Pardon the pun. Luke grins at the thought, scratching his right arm as he feels himself being pushed ever closer to wakefulness. But then he drifts off again, instinctively scratching all his itchy bits.
After a time - he’s not sure how long - Luke begins to awaken properly. He opens his eyes, taking in his surroundings.
His odd surroundings.
He blinks. Hmm, definitely odd.
He blinks again, just to be sure. Yes, the whole scenario is brimming over with oddness.
The first thing he notices is that he is actually alone after all. No Craig. Where’s Craig?
The second thing he notices follows on almost immediately from the first, and that is he is covered from head to toe in tinsel. Annoying, itchy tinsel.
But not tinsel just sitting on top of his body, mind you. Tinsel wrapped spirally around each limb. Red tinsel around his legs. Green tinsel around his arms. He can feel tinsel wrapped around his head too, but he can’t see what colour it is.
And then there’s the issue of his penis.
Slipped over his hard organ - quoits-style - is a pile of about half a dozen brightly coloured glass baubles. And perching comfortably on the end of his penis is a small, paper angel.
Luke stares at it for a few moments, uncomprehendingly, and then bursts out laughing.
**********
Craig is running towards his room, hoping to get back before Luke wakes up. He is just approaching the door, keycard at the ready, when he hears the sound of raucous laughter coming from inside the room.
Damn!
He swipes his key card through the electronic lock and opens the door. Luke looks at him, alarmed at first, but then bursts out laughing again. Craig joins in, marvelling at the sight of his gorgeous, giggling, tinsel-covered boy.
The more Luke looks at his bedecked cock, then at Craig and then back to his cock again, the harder he laughs. And the harder he laughs, the more Craig laughs as well.
“You’re a fruitcake!” Luke screams through the peals of laughter.
“Well, you’re half right,” Craig says camply.
“Where have you been?” Luke asks, still laughing.
Craig theatrically holds up a carrier bag.
“Back in a tick, sweetheart,” he says, grinning, as he takes the bag with him into the bathroom. “And don’t touch anything until I come back out!” he warns before he closes the door.
Luke watches Craig disappear and excitedly ponders the fabulous Christmas present Craig has obviously just bought for him. Not that he really needs one. He is happy just having Craig back in his life, to be honest. To him, that is the most precious gift in the world; better than anything he could ever have dreamed of.
He is scratching his left arm again, willing Craig to hurry up so he can remove this awful, itchy tinsel. He keeps glancing at the clock on the bedside cabinet, carefully timing Craig’s absence. As the time approaches ten minutes, Luke begins to get tetchy. He is about to call out to tell him to hurry up, when the bathroom door swings open and Craig bursts out, naked, and similarly adorned in tinsel, baubles and an angel.
Luke squeals with delight, but then he points at Craig with an indignant expression on his face.
“Your angel is bigger than mine!” he observes.
“Yes, well there is a good reason for that,” Craig responds, “and I don’t think I need to tell you what that is.”
“Your angel is a lot bigger than mine,” Luke persists. “In fact, proportionally, I’d say that your angel is actually quite a lot bigger than it should be.”
“Yeah, nice try Ashton,” Craig plays back. “Unless you are seriously suggesting your penis is nearly as big as mine?”
Luke bristles. “It’s not a lot smaller,” he says.
“Dream on, sunshine,” Craig replies.
“Are you saying I have a small penis?” Luke asks with mock offence.
“Not at all,” Craig replies. “I’m merely saying that yours is only slightly above-average, whereas mine is party-sized. I believe the Americans refer to it as a schlong.”
“Now who’s dreaming?” Luke snorts.
Craig is standing there, kitted out and with a huge grin on his face and Luke has only just noticed he has his hands behind his back.
“What are you hiding?” Luke asks, growing excited.
“What? Ah, yes. Merry Christmas, Luke!”
He whips his hands out and Luke only has a moment to register what it is before Craig fires off a shot. Luke jumps off the bed, dislodging his angel and - laughing - snatches the camera from Craig.
“Give that back!” Craig giggles, chasing Luke around the room, losing his angel as well. Craig stops to retrieve it and then helpfully picks up Luke’s and passes it over to him. Luke reaches out tentatively; keeping his distance, suspecting it might be a trap. When Craig doesn’t attempt to move, Luke takes it with a thank you. They stand for a moment, adjusting their costumes and eyeing each other off, smiling, before Craig launches himself at Luke.
Luke screams and takes off again. They continue to run around like this, screaming and laughing, as Luke tries to take Craig’s photo and Craig tries to stop him. Eventually, Luke pulls a slick, evasive movement - the kind that only small people call effectively do - which buys him enough time to fire off a shot.
“Too slow old man!” Luke taunts.
Satisfied, he allows Craig to catch him and they collapse on the bed, tired from running around, bellies sore from laughing. Luke lies half on top of Craig, his arms around his waist and his head on Craig’s chest, listening to his heart thumping and his noisy, borderline asthmatic breathing.
“Can I ask you something, Craig?” Luke asks, still panting.
“Mmmm?”
“How the fuck did you manage to do all this without waking me up?”
“With great difficulty, actually,” Craig confesses.
Luke rolls onto his side and looks at his penis. He bursts out laughing again and Craig smiles affectionately at him.
“There were a couple of times when you stirred and I had to wait until you fell asleep again,” Craig explains. “I was sure you would wake up properly before I had finished, though. Not surprising really, as it must have been a bit uncomfortable, judging from all the scratching you were doing.”
“Not just a bit uncomfortable. Very uncomfortable,” Luke agrees. “On the subject of which, can I take it all off now?”
“Allow me,” Craig purrs, as he reaches out for the tinsel surrounding Luke’s head.
He leans forward to kiss Luke as he unravels each ‘lap’ of tinsel. Unwinding, then kissing, unwinding, kissing, unwinding, kissing. By about the fourth kiss, Luke is gagging for more. He reaches out and gently tweaks Craig’s nipples, teasing them erect. When Craig finishes removing the tinsel, he throws it off the side of the bed.
“Ah…gold,” Luke observes as he watches it disappear.
“Sorry?”
“The tinsel around my head. I was wondering what colour it was.”
“It was a golden crown.” Craig says as he kisses Luke’s neck. “For the king of my heart.”
Luke’s eyes glaze over and he dives in for a more passionate kiss, invading Craig’s mouth and lapping hungrily as their tongues meet. He wants to kiss Craig’s chest; to lick, suck and gently nibble on his nipples, but Craig has other ideas. Instead, Craig eases him down onto his back and begins unwinding the tinsel from Luke’s arms. This time, as he unwinds he kisses the skin underneath, noting the red marks from Luke’s almost constant scratching.
“Sorry, sweetheart,” he says when he finishes with Luke’s right arm. “I had no idea this was going to irritate your skin so much.”
“You’re forgiven, gorgeous,” Luke responds with a smile. “Actually, you have no idea how much I’m enjoying this. Apart from the itching, that is,” he adds.
Craig looks down at Luke’s twitching penis and smiles back.
“I think I have some idea,” he says, before he moves onto Luke’s left arm. He unravels it quickly, rubbing the skin underneath briskly when he has finished. Luke lets out a loud, contented moan, and then pulls Craig towards him for a long, slow kiss.
“Mmmm,” Craig moans appreciatively, “now for the legs.”
He starts at Luke’s right foot and works upwards, licking as he goes this time. Luke starts to wriggle as he feels his penis buck violently. When Craig reaches Luke’s groin he stops, looking Luke square in the eyes before moving down again to start on the other leg. Luke’s moan this time is one of disappointment.
“You could have occupied yourself while you were there!” he complains.
Craig just smiles enigmatically at him as he begins to unravel the left leg; once again licking his way up to the top of Luke’s thigh.
“Now, while you’re there…” Luke leaves the question hanging.
Craig smiles and moves up the bed this time, giving Luke another deep, passionate kiss.
“My turn,” he says as he lies back on the bed.
“Oi! You haven’t finished with me yet, Gilmore! You’ve got to do my baubles and angel!” Luke cries indignantly.
“Later,” Craig says firmly. “I have plans for them. Well, for your angel at least”
Luke breaks out in an evil grin and moves over to Craig, sitting astride his chest as he leans forward to unravel the tinsel from around Craig’s head. With every tinsel lap, Luke drags his balls along Craig’s chest, checking for a reaction. Craig just smiles at him, saying nothing. But his breathing is laboured, Luke notices.
When he finishes with Craig’s head, Luke again leans in for another long kiss. He wants to indulge in a bit of frottage too, but he’s afraid he’ll knock off his angel. Craig has plans for his angel.
“Arms now?” Luke asks seductively. “Or do you want me to start on your legs?”
“Arms,” Craig pants in barely a whisper.
Luke giggles at him. “You’re not going to last much longer, are you?”
Craig shakes his head. “No.”
Luke unravels both of Craig’s arms quickly, this time dragging his balls from side to side across Craig’s belly. Craig is barely able to maintain his control. He reaches down and whips off his angel, squeezing firmly on the pressure spot to stop himself from coming and to make his erection subside slightly. When he achieves the desired outcome, he replaces the angel.
Luke watches him, sniggering.
“Better?”
“Mmmm.”
“Legs now, sweetheart?” he coos.
Craig nods, breathless again.
This time Luke turns around, his bottom facing Craig. When he bends down now to start unravelling Craig’s legs, their cocks lightly touch. Craig almost jumps off the bed.
“Like that?” Luke asks seductively as he gently rubs his angel against Craig’s. Both dislodge.
“Yeah,” Craig gasps. If Luke were facing the other way, he could see for himself how aroused Craig is; how flushed his face is, how dilated his pupils are.
And it’s not just the physical contact that Craig is enjoying - the sight of Luke’s gorgeous arse, muscles flexing and tensing, is driving him wild also. And every so often Craig gets a glimpse of Luke’s balls as he spreads his legs a bit wider; leans that little bit further forward. Craig is starting to thrash about and Luke can see he needs to put him out of his misery very soon.
Tinsel finally finished with, Luke turns around again to face Craig.
“Now. What exactly did you have planned for my angel?” he asks sweetly.
Craig gives him a wink and then dashes into the bathroom, returning with the carrier bag. From within its depths he pulls out condoms and lube.
“We ran out last night, remember?”
Luke giggles and leans in for another kiss.
Craig lies back down on the bed, removes his baubles and rips open a condom wrapper. He applies a small amount of lube to the inside tip of the condom and then rolls it down over his rock hard cock. He then liberally slaps more lubricant and looks over at Luke, noting delightedly the lascivious look he is getting back.
“Take off your baubles,” Craig instructs, “but put your angel back on afterwards.”
Luke is intrigued. “Why?”
“You’ll find out why,” Craig says, not giving anything away.
Luke does as Craig asks, settling the angel back on the end of his penis. It twitches at the contact.
“What now?” he asks urgently.
“Now you come over here and sit on this,” Craig growls sexily, holding his erection perpendicular.
**********
Luke is so desperate he practically vaults straight onto Craig’s cock. Craig guffaws and kisses him on the lips. And then kisses him again, but with increasing heat this time, as Luke begins to lower himself onto the waiting organ. As Luke begins to move up and down in long, slow piston movements, their lips remain locked together, almost as if they are afraid of breaking the contact.
They have their rhythm now – Craig knows exactly how Luke likes it and vice versa. Craig particularly likes what Luke is doing now - squeezing his sphincter muscles with every up stroke, easing out with every down stroke. It feels so good Craig is not sure how much longer he can last. He has to last because the timing has to be just right if he wants the trick to work really well. But he is getting far too excited, too early…
“Stop!” Craig orders, and Luke obediently stops.
“What’s wrong?” he asks anxiously.
“I’m too close,” Craig explains. “We need to catch you up.”
He reaches down and begins caressing Luke with firm, short strokes. He is careful not to dislodge Luke’s angel – it will be too difficult to try to put back on later, when Luke is too worked up. And he needs it to be in place for the trick. Craig keeps this up for the next few minutes, his stroking increasing in tempo and pressure as he feels Luke beginning to get close.
Finally, he indicates that the time is right to restart by thrusting urgently into Luke, who responds immediately by bouncing up and down again - hard and fast this time - on Craig’s eager and responsive cock. They are both getting close now and Craig is paying particular attention to Luke. He can see that Luke is sweating heavily, that his bouncing is getting faster and more uncontrolled, that he is groaning loudly and that his hand is hovering near his cock.
Craig feels Luke’s muscles contract tighter and, grabbing hold of Luke’s cock, he begins pumping in quick, firm strokes. He can feel that he is about to come himself, and that Luke is not far away either. Craig is hitting his own vinegar strokes now, but he’s trying hard to concentrate on Luke, pumping him fast, but still being careful not to dislodge the angel.
As Craig comes he can feel Luke suddenly gripping him hard, digging his fingers into Craig’s shoulder muscles. Luke has almost forgotten about the trick and remembers right at the last minute.
“Angel,” is all he can get out as he starts to come.
“Watch,” Craig says and just as the word is leaving his mouth, Luke’s powerful ejaculation blows the angel off the end of his cock and it lands with a gentle plop on Craig’s stomach.
**********
It took them a good couple of hours before they were able look at each other without pissing themselves laughing.
Luke thought it was the funniest thing he had ever seen.
Craig couldn’t believe that it actually worked.
Once they had finished laughing they adjourned to the bathroom where they had a leisurely shower, chatting amiably while they soaped each other up and rinsed each other down. They got worked up again of course, and made love fast and furious where they stood. The archetypal knee trembler. And fabulous it was too.
**********
They are lying on the bed now, having a fish and chip brunch. The love-play is not quite finished, though. They are feeding each other, sucking on fingers and licking sauce from around each other’s mouths. They’re kissing a lot, too, like they can hardly bear to keep their lips apart even when they are eating.
And they are both thinking how easy it has been in the end, and how comfortable in each other’s company they feel. There have been no real dramas, no arguments, no bitter or angry tears. Just a quiet confidence that they are meant to be together; that what happened in the past is no longer important; that fate has somehow preordained this and all they both need to do is relax and go with the flow, trusting that it will work out for the best.
Craig is the first to raise the subject of their future together. He knows what he wants, but he is not sure whether Luke wants the same thing. He dances carefully around the issue at first.
“How are you enjoying London Road?”
“It’s great.”
“Good people?”
“Yeah. Great.”
“Do you live close to work?”
“I’m still at home with my mum, so I have a bit of a journey every day.”
Craig nods thoughtfully.
“Do you like living at home?”
“Not really. But it’s cheap and I know mum likes the company now that Paul has moved out.”
“You think you might move out soon too?”
“Don’t know.” He eyes Craig carefully. “I’ll probably stay put unless I get a better offer.”
Craig raises his eyebrows.
“What’s your definition of a better offer?”
Luke shrugs his shoulders, but his eyes are smiling at Craig.
“Well obviously,” Craig continues, “if you were seeing someone and they asked you to move in with them, that might constitute a better offer.”
“Probably,” Luke says, smiling openly now.
Craig smiles nervously, suddenly feeling unaccountably shy and unsure. Luke sees it too and helps him out.
“Is this where you ask me to move in with you?” he asks hopefully, smiling broadly.
Craig does his Cheshire cat smile. “I was thinking I might.”
“Well I’m thinking that would be a great idea.”
“I’m glad you think so.”
“I most certainly do, Sarge.”
Craig giggles. “I love it when you call me Sarge.”
“You’ll always be my Sarge,” Luke says, his eyes shining with happiness.
“I want to be your Sarge forever,” Craig whispers fiercely, diving on Luke again, chewing on his lips, and thrusting his tongue into Luke’s mouth. Luke responds enthusiastically, sucking on Craig’s tongue, nibbling Craig’s fleshy lips, grinding himself into Craig’s body; making his arousal apparent.
Luke bends his head and starts to kiss his way downwards, stopping to lick the hollow at the base of Craig’s throat before slowly making his descent towards Craig’s nipples. He takes the first with his tongue, swiping it up and down before swirling his tongue around in slow, circular motions. A gentle nip with his teeth follows, before he sucks gently, alternating with quick licks, teasing the nipple erect. Satisfied that he has achieved the desired amount of nipple arousal, Luke moves onto Craig’s other one and repeats the process. By the time he has finished, Craig’s nipples are not the only things that are erect.
Luke now moves down further, kissing and licking as he slowly descends. Craig can feel where Luke is heading and begins to thrust towards him urgently. Luke giggles as Craig’s cock twitches violently and slaps him on the nose. Craig is so hot he is rendered speechless, but he can vocalize enough to groan loudly when Luke finally takes the hard organ in his mouth.
While Luke is fellating him, he discreetly masturbates, getting himself ripe. When he feels the time is right he takes his mouth off Craig (to great howls of protest) and reaches for a condom and the lube, preparing first himself and then Craig.
Craig’s pupils are wildly dilated and he is panting eagerly. His cock is jumping with anticipation. Luke positions himself on his knees and places the pillows underneath Craig to elevate his pelvis. Then he slowly inserts himself, relishing the look of absolute bliss on Craig’s face.
“Nice?” Luke asks.
“Heavenly,” Craig manages to croak.
Luke begins to thrust, gently and slowly at first, becoming faster the closer he moves towards his climax. He suddenly begins to giggle, and Craig looks quizzically at him. Craig’s expression makes him laugh even more.
“What?” Craig asks.
“I’ve just had a thought,” Luke says giggling.
“Yeah?”
Luke starts laughing hysterically now and he stops thrusting, his forehead resting on Craig’s chest, his shoulders shaking violently.
“Hey!” Craig complains. “Whatever happened to multi-tasking?”
Luke is so busy laughing he can’t even respond.
“Can’t you laugh and fuck at the same time?” Craig tries.
“No.” Luke manages to finally say. “I have a male brain.”
“So, what’s so funny?” Craig asks.
Luke starts laughing again.
“I was just remembering the angel,” he says.
Craig smiles. “It was pretty funny, wasn’t it?”
Luke nods. “Actually, I’m thinking it is your turn.”
Craig’s eyes light up.
“Where is it?”
“Don’t know,” Luke responds. “Can you see it from where you are?”
Craig looks over Luke’s shoulders and can’t see it on the other side of the room. Luke looks over the side of the bed and can’t see it there either.
“Maybe it is over the other side,” Craig suggests.
Luke looks down at the two of them, quite literally joined at the hip.
“How do we get over there to check?” he asks.
“Like this,” Craig says as he pulls Luke down into his arms and then begins to slowly roll them both over to the other side of the bed.
“Clever,” Luke observes as he spots the angel and leans down to pick it up.
“Thanks. That’s why I’m a Sergeant.”
“Because you know how to move from one side of the bed to the other when you are fucking?” Luke asks.
“Because I’m a problem solver,” Craig corrects, giving Luke a gentle kiss.
“Either works for me,” Luke says, smiling.
“Now, Craig Gilmore,” he continues, getting back to business, “the time has come for us to see how far we can make your angel fly!”
Chapter 9
(Take Two)
Irritably Craig shouted again,
“Luke! Where the hell are you?”
No answer was forthcoming so he put the carrier bags down just inside the doorway and went back to the car for the rest of them, muttering under his breath all the time. Where was he? Luke knew he had gone shopping so what was the difficulty in getting back from where ever he spent his after shift time these days, and helping him bring it in? As Craig dragged out the next three carrier bags he felt the first fat drops of icy rain hit his head and shoulders. Within seconds he was soaked to the skin. Stacking the final bags in the hall he gave them a push with his foot so that he could close the door properly. The end carrier bag fell over on its side, disgorging a carton of eggs. Craig heard the distinctive sound of eggshells breaking when the next carrier bag fell over on top of the carton. Within seconds slimy, yellow raw egg was spreading in a pool on the new green hall carpet.
“Fuck it!” Craig snarled, swooping down to pick up the damaged carton and try and minimise the damage to the carpet.
Several minutes later Craig had managed to wipe up the mess from the carpet leaving him just twenty-five minutes to get into work, a journey which usually took forty minutes. The shopping was still strewn about in the kitchen and he knew he didn’t have time to do anything about it.
As he grabbed his coat he heard the front door open.
“Where the hell have you been? You knew I was due on shift this afternoon.”
“I had to nip out, what’s the problem?” Luke replied, sounding not in the least repentant.
“You’re the problem! I’ve had to do everything in this house, shopping, cleaning and cooking for the last three weeks because you’re never here to do your share. I’m not your bloody mother! Start pulling your weight if you want to live here.”
Luke was tired and worn out and Craig’s words were not helping matters. He knew he had been shirking his share of home tasks but he didn’t dare tell Craig the he had been moonlighting everyday after his shift ended. He was trying to earn some extra cash so he could pay off his debts and, at Christmas time, it was easier to get casual work. Craig’s tone irked him and suddenly Luke’s exhaustion gave way to anger, and his temper exploded.
“I know you’re not my mother, she’d give me a bit of respect! Hi Luke, nice to see you Luke, had a good shift Luke?”
“Perhaps you’d bother to ring your mother and tell her where you’ve been for the last eight hours. You haven’t bothered to bloody well tell me,” Craig shouted back at him.
These days it didn’t seem to occur to Luke to let him know if he was going to be late or not, which was yet another thing that had started to get on Craig’s nerves. He wondered, at the back of his mind, if Luke was seeing someone else; he was always tired, always apparently doing ‘something else’, when there were chores to be done at home, and Luke’s interest in sex had dwindled to nothing. If he wasn’t seeing someone else then that left one thing; Craig was being taken for granted, big style, either scenario did not sit well with him.
“If your mother’s so fucking good to you, why don’t you bugger off back to her then?” Craig yelled as he pushed past Luke, slamming the front door so hard it rattled in its frame.
The silence in the dim hallway afterwards was deafening.
Luke looked down at his feet, noticing the scrubbed mark on the carpet. He frowned wondering what had happened, then his temper reasserted itself. Alright, if that was the way Craig wanted it, he would go back to his mother’s. He’d lived there before and worked at London Road, he could do it again. He’d be able to pay off his debts quicker as well if he wasn’t paying a proportion of the bills and mortgage on this place.
That sodding holiday in Sydney, last December, was the cause of most of his monetary problems, that and setting up house with Craig, and here he was, eleven and a half months later, still trying to scrape enough cash together to get his credit card and loan paid off and then start paying out for the next holiday. Craig had suggested another exotic destination for next year, two weeks in Thailand. Granted he had agreed with him, but it was going to cost and arm and a leg. Sometimes he wondered if Craig remembered Luke only had a PC’s salary not a Sergeant’s.
Marching into the lounge he pulled out all of his cd’s from the wooden bookshelves, onto the floor, picking over the shared ownership ones as well. (He conveniently forgot about the amount of money he spent on music each month and the fact that Craig generally paid whenever they ate out which was at least once a week.) He could borrow his Mum’s suitcase to put these in, it would minimise the damage to them that way. In fact, if he got his skates on he reckoned he could be packed up and moved out by the time Craig’s shift ended. He stacked his books at the side of the cd’s as well.
After a little while the lack of light in the room caught his attention. Three thirty in the afternoon and it was almost too dark to see. He put a lamp on and continued to pull out his books ready for packing. This task finished and feeling grimy he decided to get cleaned up before he packed up the rest of his gear. Walking slowly upstairs he got undressed and took a shower, his anger simmering all the time. Feeling marginally more human afterwards he left his dirty clothes scattered across the bathroom floor as a final act of defiance. Taking his travel bag from the top of the wardrobe he packed it with underwear, toiletries and casual clothes.
Descending the stairs he stalked towards the kitchen intending to make himself a coffee before he rang his Mum to ask her if he could move back in with her.
He checked on the threshold of the kitchen. The shopping, left where it had been dumped, brought back to him exactly why Craig had been so angry. He closed his eyes as he finally remembered. He had promised to be here to give Craig a hand with it, so Craig would be able to get to work on time, but the packing plant where he had obtained some temporary work were offering overtime so had taken it without a second thought and worked for a couple of hours longer than he had intended.
“Oh shit!” he said softly to himself, his annoyance evaporating abruptly leaving him feeling about three inches tall.
He couldn’t go on with working at two jobs he decided, surveying the bombsite which used to be their kitchen. Something had to give and he didn’t really want it to be this, his home and relationship with Craig. Craig was a neat freak and he annoyed Luke sometimes but he knew he was loved and he, in turn, couldn't imagine what his life would be like without Craig at the centre.
Setting to he dealt with the foodstuffs putting them all away and tidying around then he went and cleaned up the bathroom as well, laying out fresh towels and putting his dirty clothing into the laundry basket, noting, as he did so that it was getting pretty full. Sighing, he then took the basket downstairs and started doing his and Craig’s washing. He knew he might well be eating humble pie for a while, so this was a stab at getting used to the flavour.
Whilst waiting for the cycle to finish he made himself a cup of coffee and a sandwich, discovering, when he looked in the fridge, that despite his slacking, Craig had still bought both types of pate which he knew Luke adored. Another nail in the coffin of his self-centredness.
He took his provisions into the lounge and then saw his cd’s spread all over the floor. Leaving them where they were, for the time being, he finished his food then started to put them all back. When he tried to put his books back he found they wouldn’t fit. OK, virtually everything on the shelves was stacked two and three deep, but if they fitted before he knew they should fit in again. Exasperated he pulled the books out and had a look. It was too dark really to see anything properly at the back so he put his arm in. He could feel a book sized object was hanging halfway from the shelf above and blocking things going into the shelf below. He took hold and gave it a good pull down. It came free in a rush. Withdrawing his arm he looked at his prize, immediately recognising the photo album. Unable to stop himself he turned over the first page. Gawd! Was that panda like creature in the relief photo there really him? His face was pale and white and he had dark rings around his eyes. No wonder Cameron had suggested that he needed a holiday last year. He turned the page and saw a picture of the beach, Tamarama Beach, where Craig had taken him on advice from Brian, the hotel clerk. He remembered Craig complaining about getting sand in his swimming trunks and then the trip back to his hotel and the tinsel. There, on the next page, were Polaroid snaps of them both, adorned in all their glory, with green, red and gold tinsel and the angels too. He lips twisted in a smile, his memory filling in the blanks between the photographs. How could he have forgotten, in a few brief months, how bad he had felt when Craig wasn't in his life? He knew he couldn't go back to that time. This relationship was well worth working on.
The telephone shrilling out brought him back to reality. Checking the time he was shocked to discover it was nearly six in the evening and he was due on shift at ten. After taking this call he really needed to get some sleep.
“Hello.”
“Mr Ashton?”
“Yes.”
“This is Superintendent Williams. I’m afraid I have some bad news for you.”
Luke’s mouth dried and his heart began to pound.
“Craig?”
“Sergeant Gilmore has been in an accident and you’re down as his next of kin contact.”
“Accident? What kind of accident? Is he alright?”
“He’s been taken to Killington Green hospital. There was an RTA involving a lorry, a van and two cars. The lorry shed part of its load all over the road. Sergeant Gilmore was assisting when we found the lorry was carrying chemicals…..”
“Is he alright?” Luke repeated softly, not wanting to hear any more about the incident.
“I’m sorry, no. The hospital say he’s in a very bad way. I’ve sent a car to pick you up and take you to him..,”
The rest of Superintendent William’s words drifted over him like so much meaningless dust.
Craig. His Craig was dying, that’s what it usually meant when they looked up the next of kin contact details. All Luke could think about was that they had parted on such bad terms. It felt like divine retribution. Retribution for not doing his share of the household chores; retribution for taking a second job behind Craig’s back and lying to him for weeks about where he was and where he had been; retribution for not taking Craig into his confidence.
The two PC’s despatched to Sergeant Gilmore’s address found Luke ready and waiting for them. The journey to Killington Green was achieved quickly and in almost total silence. As soon as the police car pulled up outside the Accident and Emergency door, Luke knew things were bad.
Police officers were standing guard over the entrance and were rigorously checking everyone who went into the building. Once his name was given and checked against a list of names on a clipboard, Luke was ushered through the cordon and handed over to a male nurse, just inside the door.
"PC Luke Ashton, Sergeant Gilmore's partner," one of the coppers told the nurse. He nodded, smiled at Luke and motioned him to follow.
He was then quickly taken away from the waiting room area, which was completely deserted, and through a circuitous route to what was signposted as the outpatients department. Again, this area was also devoid of patients. Luke could recognise a major incident scenario in operation when he saw one.
The nurse took him to the door of a locker room.
“Go through these doors and you’ll come to a locker room. Leave your clothes in a locker then go through the shower section, don’t come back into the locker room, go out of the other end of the shower section. There are towels and protective suits. Someone will be waiting for you to check the seals on your suit before you can go any further. Are you OK with that?”
Luke nodded then went into the locker room. He undressed, showered thoroughly and walked out into another room where he found towels and a protective suit waiting for him. Continuing on through another set of double doors he found another person on the other side.
“Can I have your name please?”
“Luke. Luke Ashton.”
“Hello Mr Ashton, I’m Dr Hall. We have Sergeant Gilmore on a respirator, he's sedated so he won't be able to talk to you. You also won't be able to touch him as we're in the process of decontaminating him."
"How bad is he?" Luke asked, his voice sounded peculiar and muffled through the helmet of the suit.
Dr Hall looked out through the clear visor in his helmet and puffed out his cheeks.
"I won't lie to you Mr Ashton, he's not good. His face and hands have been burned and there is some damage to his lungs hence the respirator…."
"Can I see him?"
"You need to be in a suit, but yes, you can see him for a few minutes. Come with me."
Hall checked the seals on his suit then took him by the arm through several corridors until they reached a pair of double doors. The room beyond was brightly lit and very busy. Lots of people in the same suits he and Hall were dressed in, the beep of monitors measuring life signs, the hiss of respirators and oxygen tanks delivering air. Hall guided him over to one of the beds where several people were working over the still body. They were dabbing a clear gel all over the man's skin. His right hand and arm was covered in gauze, his left hand only was wrapped and his face was still mainly uncovered but was a mass of swelling, red and angry tissue. He was virtually unrecognisable. A thick layer of the gel made the broken skin on his face shine. The tube in his throat prevented him from speaking but his eyes were flickering.
"He's sedated to stop him fighting against the tube, also he can't speak around the tube so don't let him……."
"That's not Craig!" Luke said firmly, unable to tear his eyes away from the man on the bed.
"What?"
"That's not Craig Gilmore."
"He was carrying Craig Gilmore's warrant card in his police jacket."
"That is not my partner," Luke enunciated
clearly.
Hall pulled Luke away from the patient, who had begun to show signs of anxiety.
He lowered his voice, as he said,
"Mr Ashton, I appreciate with the facial burns it may be difficult to recognise your partner but…"
"On the contrary, it’s very easy, and that man is not Craig Gilmore. Craig Gilmore has the darkest brown eyes you'll ever see, so unless that chemical can change the colour of eyes, he isn't Craig."
Hall looked between Luke and the man on the bed, then went over and checked. Despite the swelling around them the eyes roaming pointlessly around the room were unmistakably blue.
"Mr Ashton, I'm so sorry I don't know what to say!" he apologised.
Luke had already lost interest in the man, he was busy taking a look at the other patients in the room. The other severely injured man was too small and paunchy to be Craig. He went from cubicle to cubicle trying to find his lover, becoming increasingly distressed as he failed to find him. Dr Hall was trailing ineffectually behind.
In the room at the end of the corridor of cubicles a young man's distorted voice was speaking kindly to someone else.
"The oxygen line is just to help your lungs, the chemical tends to cause your lungs to spasm, a bit like an asthma attack. We'll just put some more of this gel on here, we want to make sure we've caught any little spot…."
The nurse stopped his soothing litany at the interruption of the cubicle curtain being drawn back.
"Craig!" Luke shouted throwing himself forward at the same moment as Craig tired to get off the trolley, forgetting he was tethered by an oxygen line and tank. The nurse reacted quicker than either of them.
"No!" he shouted, standing between them, holding them apart. "You can't touch him, you could recontaminate him and burn him!"
Two sets of strong arms dragged Luke back whilst the nurse forced Craig back down on the trolley then pulled up a light green sheet to preserve his modesty.
Craig started coughing behind the mask on his face, clawing at it and trying to remove it so he could speak to Luke.
"Leave it!" Julian ordered, increasing the flow to
get additional oxygen into the constricting bronchii. "Lie back and try to
relax, or I'll have him removed," he threatened.
It worked like a magic charm. Luke stopped struggling and Craig became all meek compliance.
Luke feasted his eyes on his lover. Craig was covered from head to foot in thick, clear gel, even his hair had been anointed and was sticking up in spikes. His right hand was bandaged but he seemed to be using it without any difficulty. It was so difficult to just stand and look, when all he wanted to do was to wrap Craig in his arms. Craig's eyes were burning into him, trying to convey everything he was feeling in one look.
"Sit down over there," Julian said, pointing to a chair in the corner of the cubicle. "I've nearly finished."
Luke subsided onto the chair whilst Julian continued to apply the gel around the outside and inside of Craig's ears, around his hairline then down the back of his neck. Eventually it was applied in an even, thick layer to Julian's satisfaction.
"OK," he turned to Luke and said, "I take you're Craig’s partner?"
Luke nodded. “Luke.”
"Julian,” the nurse nodded. “The gel needs to stay on for a couple of hours. You can bring your chair nearer but you may not touch him, the outside of your suit could have picked up some contamination. And try and keep talking to a minimum, his throat is sore and so are his lungs, but that is just a temporary condition, it'll wear off. Any problems Craig, send Luke to get me, OK?"
Craig nodded.
After delivering his warning, Julian left, pulling the curtain closed. Luke pulled his chair close and sat watching Craig, his stare intense.
“What are you doing here?” Craig croaked.
“Superintendent Williams rang me, said there’d been an accident and you were hurt,” Luke’s voice shook on the last word.
“Shush, it’s alright, I’m not injured really.” Craig was desperate to touch Luke, to reassure him but he couldn’t.
“They took me into see another bloke in the other room, told me it was you. His face is covered with burns….”
Tears ran freely down Luke’s face on the inside of his helmet and he couldn’t brush them away. “It thought it was you until he opened his eyes and saw they’re blue. Oh Craig, I thought you were dying! I don’t know what I would do without you, I wouldn’t be able to go on….” The rest of his words were lost in the tears which were clogging his throat.
Craig couldn’t bear it. He was preparing to hop off the trolley when Julian came back.
“Oh no you don’t! I knew this would happen. Luke I’m going to have to ask you to leave.”
“Ju, please!” Craig whispered.
Luke just looked up, his tear stained face clearly visible through the visor.
“I’m sorry guys. You’re both upset and you won’t be able to keep your hands off each other for the next two hours. Luke, you can go and get changed and wait at the nurses station, I’ll bring Craig to you when we’ve finished with him. He’s going to be absolutely fine, there’s nothing to worry about.”
Helping him up off the chair, Julian guided him back out of the cubicle. He had a quick word with Dr Hall, and then handed him over, patting him on the back as he left.
Hall guided him back to the shower area.
“Luke, leave your suit in the room where you first saw me. Go through the showers again, and then you can get dressed. When you get to the doors at the other end, go through and take the first left, then left again. You’ll see the nurse’s station just ahead of you. Staff Nurse Willis will bring Craig to you when he’s been decontaminated. We’ll be giving him some inhalers to ease his lungs for a couple of days, make sure he takes them hom. Alright?”
Luke nodded and went into the shower block.
It felt like the longest two hours ever. He drank very bad coffee with the other nurses who were there, wasn’t up to making much conversation though. About an hour after he got there the telephone rang. Unconsciously Luke hunched waiting to be told that Craig wasn’t getting out this evening but no-one said anything to him. He jumped at every little sound. By the time he saw Craig heading towards him dressed in surgical scrubs he was a nervous wreck. He hugged Craig so hard he heard his ribs creaking but didn’t want to let him go. He could hear someone nearby almost sobbing, taking great whooping breaths of air trying to stop the tears. It was a couple of minutes before he realised he was the person making that noise. Craig was holding him tightly and rocking him in his arms as if he couldn’t ever let him go again.
An apologetic cough behind him only served to slightly slacken Craig’s hold on him.
“Sergeant Gilmore, Superintendent Williams’ compliments, we’ve been detailed to take you and Mr Ashton home.”
Craig nodded in acknowledgement then, with an arm about Luke’s shoulders they followed the two traffic cops out to the waiting car. Making sure Craig had his bag of inhalers and the emergency telephone number of the hospital with him, Luke guided him out of the car and into their house. As soon as the front door was shut, before bothering with the lights Luke had pushed Craig against the wall and was devouring his mouth, not that Craig was far behind.
Craig’s skin smelt of chemical lemons and his breath tasted of some indeterminate false mint but Luke couldn’t get enough of him. If he had died in the next minute Luke couldn’t have thought of a finer way of spending the last few minutes of his life. He felt Craig sway a little in his arms then recover.
“What am I thinking of, you should be in bed,” Luke whispered.
“I’m OK,” Craig whispered back. “I just need to get into some decent clothes.” He plucked at the thin green shirt.
“What happened to your uniform?”
“They cut it off me as soon as they got me in hospital,” Craig replied, hoarsely.
“You go and get changed and I’ll make us some tea,” Luke said, switching on the hall light.
Slowly Craig made his way upstairs, watched all the way up by Luke. Then he went into the kitchen and put the kettle on. He was bustling about making tea and some sandwiches so it was a couple of minutes before he noticed Craig standing at the bottom of the stairs, one hand on the banister, still dressed in scrubs, holding Luke’s packed travel bag in his other, shaking hand. Tear tracks on Craig’s cheek reflected wetly in the light from the kitchen. Wordlessly Craig held out the bag towards him, his eyes full of unbelievable hurt and pain.
“Oh Craig, no! It’s not like that. I didn’t mean it,” Luke spluttered.
“You’re leaving me? You do have someone else,” Craig whispered brokenly.
“No! I don’t want anyone else. I want you, only you.” Luke held Craig by his upper arms, shaking him a little when he saw Craig shake his head in disbelief. He could feel Craig trembling. “Come on. Come and sit down.”
Taking charge Luke propelled he bigger man into the lounge and pushed him down on the settee.
Craig just sat there, white faced and shocked.
“I couldn’t really leave you Craig, I’d rather cut my own throat. I was being stupid. I’d forgotten I’d promised to help you with the grocery shopping this afternoon and I was so tired I just got really childishly angry when you shouted at me.”
“Why are you always tired?” Craig croaked painfully then coughed.
Luke got up from his knees in front of Craig and rushed into the kitchen for a glass of water. Craig took the glass and gratefully sipped the contents.
“Please, Luke, tell me the truth.”
“I’m not seeing anyone else,” Luke affirmed looking into the widely dilated eyes above him. “I promise I’m not doing that.”
“Then what have you been doing after your shift ends?” Craig asked.
“Promise you won’t get angry.”
“How can I promise until you tell me?”
“Just promise you’ll stay calm,” Luke said, taking hold of both of Craig’s hands in his.
Craig looked down at him and nodded
slightly.
“I’ve been moonlighting,” Luke replied, looking shamefaced at Craig.
“Oh Luke! Why, for gods sake why? It’s a sackable offence!” Craig croaked at him.
“I know it is but I needed the money. I’m still trying to pay off my credit card bills from Sydney last year and next month we need to pay the deposit on the holiday in Thailand. I just can’t afford everything on my salary Craig.”
“Why didn’t you tell me? Why didn’t you say anything?”
“And what would you have done? Applied for a police loan to pay everything off for me?”
“Probably.”
“I’m twenty six, Craig, I can’t let you drag me out of the mire every time. I should be able to sort myself out.”
Craig remained silent. There was nothing he could say to that. Instead he remarked softly,
“You can’t keep moonlighting.”
“I know. I’d already decided to knock it on the head and come clean to you this afternoon, after I saw the shopping all over the place.”
Craig smiled. This afternoon seemed to be a million miles away.
“That’s what caused the accident this afternoon,” Craig said quietly. “PC Kent has been moonlighting as a relief driver for the tanker company. After the van ran into the tanker, and he saw me pull up and start to take statements he panicked and tried to drive off, but the tank had been damaged in the collision, it ruptured, spilling the load all over the place, it covered him and the driver. I think they were taking the stuff to be dumped illegally. The paperwork didn’t check out and a load of that toxicity should have had a police escort.”
“You covered him with your jacket didn’t you, that’s why everyone thought he was you at first.”
Craig nodded. “I’m sorry Luke, I didn’t mean to worry you like that.”
“Not your fault. Kent’s going to get dismissed, isn’t he?”
“If he lives long enough,” Craig replied.
Luke looked at him in shock.
“The driver died before they let me out, they didn’t expect Kent to last until morning. That stuff is lethal in even small quantities. I was very, very lucky.”
Luke wrapped his arms around Craig’s waist, thanking whichever gods were listening for keeping Craig safe and giving him a second chance with him.
Craig was getting tired now, a combination of the horrible day, emotional exhaustion and the drugs he’d been given in hospital coming together all at once. He felt himself being led up to bed, gently undressed and then laid down and the duvet pulled up over him. When Luke pulled away, he retained his hand.
“It’s alright. I’m coming back in a minute.”
Reluctantly Craig released his hand and drifted off.
Quickly Luke unpacked the travel bag, replaced his books on the shelves, tidied the kitchen, locked up then went to bed himself. Quietly he slid into bed and took Craig into his arms. The movement woke Craig.
“You staying?”
“I’m staying.”
“Thailand doesn’t matter next year,” Craig slurred sleepily.
“You really wanted to see the place,” Luke reminded him. “You we